Who should you bring to your wedding consultation?

Brides and grooms will often ask me about who they should consider bringing to their floral consultation. It’s not a simple answer. If you have encouraged members of your family or close friends to aid you in your planning, then they may be natural candidates for you to have in attendance. Some couples like to include a member of the family who has offered to pay for their floral décor in an attempt to learn together about the costs associated with wedding flowers.

Most often, a bride or groom asks whether they should be including their intended or fiance. A great question. As we all learn, weddings are a wonderful time to begin practicing the art of couple’s diplomacy, creating a foundation for negotiating major life decisions.

 Jennifer Morris, owner of J. Morris Flowers in Leesburg, Virginia.

Jennifer Morris, owner of J. Morris Flowers in Leesburg, Virginia.

Your floral consultation should be a fully engaging creative process where you and your designer really explore your vision and style, and then, begin to solidify the designs that capture your ideas (with a review of your budget). Every member of your entourage (the folks that come to your consult) should understand that we are focused most on getting to your inspiration. We are really going to direct all of our questions to you and if the meeting shifts to someone else, we will carefully and politely re-direct the conversation back to you and your fiance. And, yes, we have been in meetings where a well-intended guest has suggested a different look or style. It’s our job to help you consider their thoughts in balance with your own ideas.

Our goal is to educate you about flowers and décor options. For that reason, the information we share with you will be directed toward the flowers and colors that you seem to gravitate towards.

So, who might you consider asking to attend your meeting? Your fiancé. Your mom or dad, your fiance’s parents, or both. Another knowledgeable family member or friend. A member of your bridal party. And, so on.

I would suggest asking yourself a few of questions before including a lot of other people in your meeting. Will each member of the group share your enthusiasm for the process? Do they each understand that first and foremost we are there to talk with you? Have they demonstrated an interest in your ideas in other phases of wedding planning?

Here’s an idea. Give everyone who is coming an overview of what they should expect in the meeting (our team members Heather and Micaela will have reviewed this with you) and then create a few guidelines or ground rules.

1. Ask that you take the lead in the conversation.

Share your ideas and vision with the group before you arrive and get some of their feedback ahead of time. This way, each member will know that you are aware of their opinions.

2. Focus on florals and décor.

Agree to limit conversations about overall wedding plans during your hour and hour and a half with us as we really need this time with you. It might be a good idea to discuss the budget for your flowers ahead of time. We will bring up a lot of things like cakes, tables, photography and ceremony décor. These topics can have the power to inspire a whole range of conversation.

3. Suggest that your guests take a real support role.

We will cover a lot and as you are really going to be engaged in the conversation, you might really benefit from having someone there who is prepared to listen carefully and even take some notes.

We are so excited to meet with you and whomever you plan to bring. We hope that you will all enjoy the meeting. Leesburg has some lovely restaurants, breweries and coffee shops so by all means, plan a few excursions around your consult.